It's only later - 1o or 20 years on - where we discover that friends around us are dying and we're not really doing what we want to do. Our happiness is derived through their happiness - or so we think. Whether because we're explicitly told or just because we unconsciously adopt it, we make key life choices - about where to go to school, what to study, and where to work - because we think it's what will make our parents happy. Related to that lack of confidence, a lot of us get sucked into living the life that we think a good son or daughter should live.
Living the life that my parents wanted me to live instead of the one I wanted to. Later on, we wish we could have been more self-confident.Ĩ. Maybe we just thought poorly of ourselves. Why did we allow the concerns of others to weigh so heavy on us instead of trusting our own beliefs? Maybe we didn't think we were worth having what we wanted. Related to the previous point, a big regret for most of us is questioning why we had such little confidence in ourselves. On our death beds, none of that matters.ħ. How will they judge us? In the moment, we think their opinions are crucial to our future success and happiness. Most of us place way too much importance on what other people around us think about us. Worrying about what others thought about me so much. It is tough to simply be happy with the love that you've found and takes away from the special moments you have today, if you're constantly thinking back to what you once had - which actually might not have been half as good as we think it was.Ħ. Most play a never-ending game of "what might have been" for the rest of their lives. Maybe we dumped someone that we wish we hadn't. Romance is a big area of regret for most of us. Breaking up with my true love/Getting dumped by them. We know constantly checking email and Twitter in the evenings and on weekends takes us away from quality time with family and friends. It's right next to us in the shower, just in case we see a new email icon light up through the steamed up shower glass. Many of us can't get off our phone/email addiction.
Turned off my phone more/Left my phone at home. We always wonder what it would be like to sit down with them again for a coffee.Ĥ. Sometimes, we thought to pick up the phone, but maybe we don't have their number or email any more. We might have stayed in touch at first but then got busy. There's usually one childhood or high school friend who we were best buddies with. Stayed in touch with some good friends from my childhood and youth. We usually take some small solace in hearing that that bully later on made some unfortunate career stumble.ģ. We remember that one time we wish we'd told him off - even if it cost us our job. And by the way most of us have also met up with a bully in our work life. We never seem to forget - or forgive ourselves - for not speaking up against the bullies. Believe it or not, a lot of our biggest regrets in life have to do with things that happened to us in grade 4 or some other early age. Standing up to bullies in school and in life. Days turn to months and then years and then decades.Ģ. I'll make it up with the family this weekend." But the "making up" never seems to happen. "What will my boss and co-workers think? It's not a big deal if I stay late this one time. How do you balance meeting that short-term deadline at work and sitting down for dinner with your family? It's tough. Working so much at the expense of family and friendships. The question is, are you going to change anything this afternoon or tomorrow in light of this list? Or are you going to go back to your busy life?ġ. Here is a list of the 25 biggest ones we'll probably have.
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